Tag Archives: iu

I’m tired of bouncers handing my ID back to me like it’s a photo of their sister being gang-banged—–A Think Piece

Nobody but bouncers get a free pass for having such a dog-shit attitude. Nurses that go feces-hunting in the elderly’s hospital gowns don’t scowl like bouncers.  I’ve seen bait worms that did their job with more enthusiasm. Reading a number off a piece of plastic, the … Continue reading

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Can I Masturbate in Your Shower? Pt 3: “Chicago”

All I could think about was what a sucker I was. You fly across the country then take a commute train called the “L” (which somehow stands for ‘eLevated’, which doesn’t make a whole lot of “E” (‘sEnse’)), then walk … Continue reading

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Hippies/Hicks Clash Over Proposed Bunny Population Control

As the sun begins to regularly show up in the sky and students the exact opposite to class it’s becoming clear that spring has finally arrived.  With it, wildlife is back on campus after their extended winter vacations organized through … Continue reading

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My Religious Fundamentalist Buddy Pete Feels Strongly that You’re Going to Hell

Every city has a few crazies that scream at traffic with their ear to the bible.  Bloomington, Indiana is no different.  On sunny days he posts outside the biggest building on campus and loudly reminds students passing by how sinful … Continue reading

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